Part 3
Let's pick up the Islamic story of Satan and hell from the Hadith. I will be quoting from the History of al-Tabari, Creation to the Flood. Tabari I:249 "There was an angelic tribe of jinn, and Iblis belonged to it. Iblis [Satan/Lucifer] was one of the noblest angels and governed the most honored tribe." Tabari I:251 "Whoever among them says: I am a god besides Him, will have Hell as his reward from Us. That is how We reward the wrongdoers.' [Qur'an 21:29] This verse was revealed specifically for Iblis, when he said what he said. May Allah curse him and have him stoned!" We've just been given a rather interesting clue: the Qur'an was revealed for Lucifer's benefit. And ask yourself, how is a "stone" going to curse or punish a spirit?
"Iblis belonged to a tribal group called jinn. They were created from the fire of simoom. All of the angels except this tribal group were created from light. The jinn mentioned in the Qur'an were created from a tongue of white-hot fire blazing on its side. [Qur'an 55:15] The first to dwell on the earth were jinn. They caused corruption on it and shed blood and killed each other. [Since demons are spirits, how could they shed blood and bleed?] Allah sent Iblis with an army of angels to fight against the jinn. Iblis and the angels with him caused a bloodbath, but his success went to his head." Allah made Lucifer a traitor against his own tribe, which is exactly what happened with Muhammad in Mecca.
Tabari I:252 "Allah created some creatures and said, 'Prostrate yourselves before Adam.' They replied, 'We shall not do that.' Allah sent a fire to consume them."
Four things should be perfectly clear. First, if you don't prostrate yourself, you're scorched. And while that sounds extreme, it's designed to frighten Muslims. Muhammad is quoted in a Hadith from Bukhari entitled "Prayer is Obligatory" saying: Bukhari:V1B11N617 "I would order someone to collect firewood and another to lead prayer. Then I would go burn the houses of men who did not present themselves at the compulsory prayer and prostration." Islam means submission, and the sign of submission is prostration. The mosque, the centerpiece of Islamic control, is derived from the Arabic word for "the place of prostration."
Second, Satan is a jinn. Third, jinn are bad. And fourth, everybody associated with jinn loves fire - Muhammad and Allah included. I share this because of the impact it has on two of the most troubling narratives in the Qur'an. And those passages, surprisingly enough, don't include the Satanic Verses, in which Muhammad received scripture from Lucifer. They are instead ones in which Satan’s jinn are used to endorse the Qur'an.
The first of these demonic interludes begins, like so many others, with a threatening rant before it torments us with nonsense. Qur'an 46:27 "We have destroyed habitations all around you, having explained Our signs in different ways to them that they may turn back. Why then did the gods they had taken apart from Allah as protectors not come to their aid? In fact they strayed away from them." This is weird. Did the other gods stray away from men, making them real, or did men stray away from the other gods, making the condemnation irrelevant?
"It was all a lie what they had contrived!" After enduring a litany of Muhammad’s whoppers, that's quite a claim. But nothing compared to this... Qur'an 46:29 "Remember when We turned a company of jinn towards you to listen to the Qur'an? They arrived when it was being recited, and they said: 'Keep silent.' When it was over they came back to their tribe, warning them: 'O our people [fellow demonic jinn], we have listened to a Book which has come down after Moses, confirming what was sent down before it, showing the way to the truth and a path that is straight." The jinn are endorsing the Qur'an as being truthful, a straight path. That's like Churchill asking Nazis to confirm his policies. Can you imagine a god so desperate he'd solicit demonic assistance? The Good Housekeeping Seal-of-Approval, this is not.
And it didn't stop there. The demons went on to say: Qur'an 46:31 "Jinn, listen to [Muhammad] the Messenger of Allah, and believe in him, so that He may forgive you your sins and save you from a painful doom." Satan’s demonic spirits just proclaimed that Muhammad was their savior and their messenger. Either Muhammad’s Qur'an recital was so convicting it saved devils or the devils are deceiving men by calling his lie "true." You make the call.
Back in Paradise, the Prophet's Companions explain, Tabari I:273 "Iblis was cursed, and Adam settled in. Adam used to go about all alone, not having a spouse to dwell with. He fell asleep, and when he woke up, he found sitting at his head a woman who had been created by Allah from his rib. [I know you've heard this before. So had Muhammad.] He asked her what she was, and she replied, 'A woman.' He asked for what purpose she had been created, and she replied, 'For you to dwell with me.' The angels, looking to find out the extent of Adam's knowledge, asked him her name. He replied, 'Eve, because she was created from a living thing.' And Allah said, 'Adam, dwell in Paradise! Eat freely of its plenty wherever you wish.'" The omission of God’s warning not to eat of the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil may not have been left out of this account by accident. In Islam there is no choice, therefore, no reason for the tree. While it exists in other variations, it serves no purpose. Man is predestined to his fate. The reason for the tree in Genesis is to provide Adam with a choice. And it is the same choice we must all make - love God or reject him. Love cannot be compelled. Even God can't require love.
A Tradition reveals: "He then cast slumber upon Adam as we have heard from the people of the Torah among the people of the Book." I'm told that confession is good for the soul. At least they had the good sense and common courtesy to say where Muhammad stole his material.
Tabari I:275 "Iblis wanted to meet them in Paradise, but the keepers prevented him from entering. He went to a snake, an animal with four feet like a camel. Iblis tried to persuade it to let him enter its mouth and take him to Adam. The snake agreed, passed by the keepers, and entered without their knowledge, because that was Allah’s plan." If Allah’s plan was to help Satan deceive man, you know whose side Allah was on.
"Iblis talked to Adam from the mouth of the snake, but Adam paid no attention to him. So Iblis said, 'Adam, may I lead you to the tree of eternity and a power that never decays.... Both you and Eve will have eternal life and will never die.'" Since there was no death or dying in Paradise, how would Adam know what decay was? How could he be enticed to be eternal when he was created that way? "I give you good advice. But by tearing their clothes, Iblis wanted to show them their secret parts, which had been concealed from them. From his reading of the books of the angels, he knew what Adam did not, that they had secret parts." Wait a minute. Adam was supposed to be smart and the angels stupid. Now we're told the angels are smart enough to have books and Adam is oblivious.
Tabari I:276 "Adam refused to eat but Eve came forward and ate. Then she said, 'Eat, Adam. I have and it has done me no harm.' But when Adam ate, their secret parts became apparent to them and they started to cover themselves with leaves of Paradise stitched together. [Qur'an 7:22]" I don't get it. Why would showing Adam and Eve their private parts seduce them into rebellion? If sex isn't good, why is it the essence of Islamic Paradise?
As you might expect, there is more than one version of this story. So for some comic relief let's look at another variant: Tabari I:276 "Iblis proposed to the animals on earth that they should take him into Paradise so that he could speak with Adam and his spouse, but every animal refused. Finally, he spoke to the snake. It was dressed and walking on four feet, but Allah then undressed it and made it walk on its belly." Conjuring up the image of a dressed snake walking with a fiery jinn in its mouth, on four feet, being undressed by god, takes some doing.
Over the next few pages, the man solely responsible for inventing Islam, Allah, and the Qur'an said, "The tree's branches were intertwined and it bore fruit which the angels ate to live eternally." Then, "Adam went inside the tree to hide." And, "Eve cut the tree and it bled. The feather that covered Adam and Eve dropped off." So, Tabari I:278 "Now Eve, as you caused the tree to bleed, you will bleed every new moon, and you, snake, I will cut off your feet and you will walk slithering on your face." For giggles: "Some camels were originally jinn." And: Tabari I:279 "It was a tree which made whoever ate from it defecate. But there must be no faeces in Paradise." Since the angels ate from it to live eternally, where might they have answered the call of nature?
For another insight into the mind of Muhammad and therefore into the character of his god: Tabari I:280 "Allah said, 'It is My obligation to make her bleed once every month as she made this tree bleed. I must also make Eve stupid, although I created her intelligent.'" Zayd, Muhammad’s adopted son said, Tabari I:280 "Because Allah afflicted Eve, all of the women of the world menstruate and are stupid." It’s a wonder there are any Muslim women. It’s a wonder feminist organizations are silent. Why do they tolerate a doctrine that demeans six hundred million women?
Tabari I:281 "I heard him swear by Allah unequivocally, 'As long as Adam was in his right mind, he would never have eaten from the tree. Eve gave him wine and got him drunk. She led him to the tree.'" Muhammad didn't like women very much. Bukhari:V4B55N547 "The Prophet said, 'But for the Israelis, meat would not decay, and if it were not for Eve, wives would never betray their husbands.'" He didn't like Jews, either.
Tabari I:282 "The Messenger said, 'Friday was the Lord of Days. On Friday, Adam was created and cast down to earth. The duration of Adam and Eve's stay in Paradise was five hours.'" As usual, Muhammad had a reason for enduring the criticism these preposterous accounts surely brought him. Friday was important. Muhammad and his followers had observed the Jewish Sabbath and prayed facing the Temple Mount in Jerusalem. (It seemed only natural; they had taken everything else from Jews.) But eventually the Jews in Yathrib, today’s Medina, mocked the Messenger one too many times. So Muhammad decided to differentiate his Islam from the religion of his tormentors. Saturday was theirs. Sunday was taken, something about a resurrection. Friday became the lord of days. All Muhammad needed was a little justification.
What do you suppose happened to Adam once he was deported? The Bible picks up the story in Mesopotamia, where recorded history began, but not Islam. Muhammad had another agenda. Tabari I:290 "Allah cast Adam down to earth. The place where he fell down was the land of India." Why India, you ask? Because: "When Adam was cast down there, some of the smell of Paradise clung to India's trees." Aisha, Muhammad’s wife told us that he said, "The things I love most are women and perfume." The Prophet was simply trying to excuse his preoccupation with smelling good. If his perfumes were created in paradise, smelling good was religious rather than self-indulgent.
Tabari I:291 "Adam was cast down in India and Eve in Juddah. He went in search of her, and eventually they were united. Eve drew near him, hence Muzdalifah. They recognized each other, hence Arafat. And they were united in Jam, hence Jam." If the India story was conceived to rationalize the prophet's obsession with perfume, why this elaborate tale? It’s all about Muhammad’s third and fourth vices - power and money. He wanted to legitimize and then control the pagan hajj. It was the source of the region's power and wealth during his day. Each of the places Muhammad claims the amorous couple traversed were just outside Mecca. Going to them was part of the pagan rites he later incorporated into Islam. So he was validating his claim to the religious scam he would soon steal.
Tabari was criticized for these stories. So he said, "The soundness of this is established by a report serving as conclusive proof that Adam was cast down in India. It is rejected neither by the Muslim scholars nor by the people of the Torah and Gospel. Proof is firmly established by reports from some of them." As you have seen, justifying the unjustifiable has caused Muslims to latch on to imaginary verifications. There is nothing in the Torah or Gospels that says Adam was dropped in India. The Biblical Garden of Eden was on Earth, not heaven; it was located near the headwaters of the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers and the Black Sea.
Tabari I:292 "It has been mentioned that the summit of the mountain upon which Adam was cast down is one of those closest to heaven. When Adam was cast upon it his feet were on it while his head was in heaven. He heard the songs of the angels. The angels were afraid of him so his size was reduced." The Islamic heaven must be very low.
Knowing Muhammad, there had to be an ulterior motive. The prophet was trying to rationalize something. What do you suppose it was this time? Tabari I:293 "When Allah cast Adam down from Paradise, Adam's feet were on earth while his head was in heaven. He became too familiar with the angels and they were in awe of him so much so that they complained to Allah in their various prayers. Allah, therefore, lowered Adam. But Adam missed what he used to hear from the angels and felt lonely. He complained to Allah and was sent to Mecca. On the way every place where he set foot became a village, and the interval between his steps became a desert until he reached Mecca."
We're getting close. It’s important for Muhammad, and thus Islam, to place Adam in Mecca. Could there be more? "Allah sent down a jewel of Paradise where the House [Ka'aba] is located today. Adam continued to circumambulate it until Allah sent down the Flood." There you have it. To make the insignificant pagan Ka'aba seem godly and important, and to have the stone that represented the most senior idol of the Meccan pantheon appear like it belonged to Islam, we see Allah sending Adam to the Ka'aba and giving him his Black Stone. We even have Adam circumambulate it like a good Muslim for a thousand years, helping to justify Islamic ritual. Muhammad was not only the world's worst prophet, he was the world's most transparent liar.
Now all Muhammad needed to do was connect the Ka'aba to Abraham so he could rationalize Islam’s reliance on the Hebrew Bible. With the Bible snagged, he had himself a religion. Tabari I:293 "That jewel was lifted up until Allah sent Abraham to (re)build the House. This is meant by Allah’s word, 'And We established for Abraham the place of the House as residence.' [Qur'an 22:26]" Muhammad was as predictable as sunrise.
You probably noticed the (re) before build. In the creation account Allah built the Ka'aba himself. Then it was built by Adam. Now we are told that Abraham built it. So I ask you: how many times should a prophet be allowed to contradict himself before he is no longer considered a prophet?
The legends behind the Ka'aba are essential to Islam. If they don't make sense, neither does the religion. Tabari I:293 "Allah founded the House together with Adam. Adam's head was in heaven while his feet were upon the earth. The angels were afraid so his size was reduced to sixty cubits (30 meters). Adam was sad because he missed the angelic songs. He complained, and Allah said, 'Adam, I have cast down a house for you to circumambulate, as one circumambulates My Throne.' Adam came to the House, and he and the prophets after him circumambulated it." In this account we have the Ka'aba being built in heaven and also being built cooperatively by Adam and Allah. Either way, it's a wonder the Islamic god would take credit for building something so crude and unsightly.
Reducing Adam is a fairytale. As is the desert forming between his strides and villages cropping up in his footsteps. So then, when does the make-believe world of Islam end and the real world begin? When do we move out of fiction and into nonfiction? Stated another way, can you trust a man who is willing to base his religion on stories this farfetched? If he had to deceive us to make the Ka'aba seem worthy of devotion, is it?
Tabari I:294 "When Adam's size was lowered to sixty cubits, he started to say, 'My lord! I was your protégé in Your House, having no Lord but You to protect me. There I had plenty to eat and could dwell wherever I wanted. But then You cast me down to this holy mountain. There I used to hear the voices of the angels and see them crowd around Your Throne and enjoy the sweet smell of Paradise. Then you cut me off from these things."
This is a confession. Muhammad saw himself as Allah’s protégé - if not as Allah himself. He constantly looked for people to protect him, and as an orphan, he was deprived of food. His own tribe became so disgusted with his continual taunts they made travel difficult for him. He was consumed with a desire to make Allah’s House and Mecca both his and important. He indulged in the sweet smell of perfume and repeatedly claimed that he could hear the angels. What's more, his Qur'an is filled with complaints.
Muhammad couldn't even keep his own twisted version of Adam straight. Listen to this excerpt in which the prophet's indulgences were falsely manifest in Adam: Tabari I:318 "He built for himself cities and castles and populated them and made them prosperous. He also assembled weapons and established a cavalry. At the end of his life, he became a tyrant. He took the name of Adam and said, 'If someone calls me by any other name, I shall cut off his hand.' He married thirty women and they gave him many offspring. He liked them and promoted them so that later kings were their offspring. His realm expanded greatly." Muhammad just couldn't help himself. He used a twisted caricature of Adam to make his warped existence seem godly. Muslims want us to believe that Adam, like Muhammad, was a warrior, an unbridled libertine, a prophet, and a politician who hated nicknames.
Yes, according to Islam, Adam was just like Muhammad: Tabari I:319 "Adam and his descendants were prophets with royal authority and rulership on Earth. Allah made him a prophet and messenger to his children. He revealed to Adam twenty-one scrolls. Adam was taught them by Gabriel and wrote them down with his own hand. Among the things Allah revealed to Adam was the prohibition against eating dead animals and pork. He also revealed to him the letters of the alphabet on twenty-one leaves." Writing began with pictures, not letters. And since we know it, how did it escape their god's grasp?
While that's a detail, there's a bigger issue at stake. Muhammad’s absurd and transparent bastardization of Biblical characters was essential to establishing his credibility and thus to imposing his religion. Ultimately, exposing Muhammad’s motivation for doing so is central to understanding the mess the world is in today.
